Carbon copier

Rabid is as committed to the environment as anyone. We’ve only got the SUV because we’re in the computer support business. Have you seen the state of people’s driveways? And talk about steep!

That’s why we ordered the seven-litre V8 option. It’s a practical solution to a serious customer support problem. Although we did notice the shop next door has an even bigger SUV so we’ve made a note to ask them to justify that outrageous choice before we upgrade.

What’s really overdue is a carbon trading scheme and Rabid is well pleased that both the government and the opposition have promised to introduce this planet-saving system after the election. That gives us a bit more time to get sorted before the trading begins in earnest. You wouldn’t think there would be all that much scope for Rabid Reseller to take advantage of carbon trading, but that’s because most people don’t pay attention to the details.

For starters there’s the back wall of the garage. Rabid always follows good motoring practice and warms up the engine for an hour before setting off for the day, so the wall behind the SUV has a really nice coating of black soot, and that, dear readers is gold to a carbon trader! We’ve got the nephew, Sk8er Boi, scraping it off daily now into a jar, so we’ll be ready as soon as the legislation is enacted.

Another source of valuable carbon missed by many traders can be found right there in your copier or laser printer. Just what do you think that toner is made from? Just because the front panel says it’s empty doesn’t mean there aren’t a few grams to be scraped from the empty container. Sk8er Boi still hasn’t perfected his technique on this one yet. He keeps turning into a black and white minstrel and singing “Mammy” every time he changes the toner cartridge.

If you’re like Rabid, you probably don’t trust all this point-of-sale electronic wizardry. Rabid knows enough about computers not to trust them to run his accounts. For that reason we still use an old-style invoice book which makes one copy for the customer and one copy for the shop. And how does it work this magic? Sk8er’s got a tidy collection of used sheets of invoicing carbon paper and he’s been working on a high-tech solution to separate the black gold from the backing sheet.

A more obvious contribution to the carbon war chest comes from Rabid’s decision to ban the use of ballpoint pens. That’s right, here we use only pencils. Sure they break now and then but nothing gets wasted and the centre of those pencils is made from, you guessed it, carbon!

If you’re tempted to join Rabid’s new green commitment and start collecting your own carbon, there are a few places around the home worth investigating.

For those who still have a wood-fired heater, endless quantities of carbon can be scraped from the chimney, but you’ll need to hire nephews a bit younger than Sk8er Boi. That porker can’t fit down many chimneys since he left primary school. But there’s always the barbecue. Stop throwing out those bangers that got left on the hot plate to ‘keep warm’. Solid carbon! Solid gold!
Gotta go! Emission targets to meet!

“Another source of valuable carbon ... can be found right there in your copier or laser printer.”

carbon copier training & development