Opinion: Protect me now, just ask how

First they took the fight to Telstra over their horrible misleading adverts which falsely claimed you could make a phone call over the NextG network "everywhere you need it." Poor Telstra thought the ACCC had taken issue with their coverage maps. Nah! The ACCC was worried that some people might not realise you need an aerial to get that coverage. Damn right too. I'd like to see the ACCC rip Holden a new one while they're in the mood. Nothing in their advert for the new Commodore told me I'd have to put petrol in the damn thing. And steer the stupid car. How is that an "automatic?"

And what about those rotters at eBay? They want to force all their sellers to use PayPal and that will shut the market for all those other companies offering payment over the Internet. Why, there's……oh well, there's…..ahh. surely….there's…..come on! Somebody must know at least ONE? Oh, yeah, there's VISA and Mastercard, yeah, let's protect them against the big bad monopoly of PayPal. Before you know it the poor credit card companies won't be able to sting both the customers and the retailers on every transaction in the mall and that will be the end of our democratic way of life, let me tell you right now.

This is playing right into hands of the terrorists. In fact, the Taliban are probably behind PayPal and NextG. Come to think of it, they probably secretly own Microsoft as well. Have you tried putting a beard on Bill Gates in Photoshop? Ahah! You see what I mean? That's right, the only way to ensure our freedom is to use Linux to access eBay and send cash via snail mail for everything we purchase. And stop using the evil NextG immediately and go back to CB radio for communications. 10-4 good buddy, over and out.