The hard life of an international megastar

There was considerable consternation in the Internet community this past week, as Richard Starkey, MBE, former drummer for Rory Storme and the Hurricanes amongst other groups, declared via a video on his website that, after 20 October, he will no longer be accepting fan mail of any kind.

He wants no letters, no objects to be signed, “nothing”.

If the date stamped on your letter is after the 20th, “it will be tossed”.

Well, you can imagine the commotion, as people all over the world cried out in unison, “Ringo Starr still gets fan mail?”

Well, it seems, yes he does.

But, it seems, he doesn’t want to.

He has, he claims, “too much to do”.

The man is 68 years old after all and probably wants to dedicate himself
to pursuits more suited to a man of his seniority – running for President perhaps.

The interesting thing – and I know you were waiting for me to get to the interesting thing – is that on the very same website where he demands that people no longer send him anything at all after 20 October, there appear details of a photo competition being run, whereby fans send in their photos taken at recent concerts.

The closing date for entries is 30 October.

Clearly Ringo is some kind of Yoda-like guru figure, challenging his disciples with unsolvable conundra – like how do I send him something on the 29th without sending him anything after the 20th?

Well you see, therein lies the secret to enlightenment my fine friends.

Of course the obvious irony is that this message requesting that fans cease communicating with him appeared on his MySpace page, and also his website at ringostarr.com — both of them clearly set up to facilitate communication between Ringo and his fans.

It would seem obvious to me – and I admit I have very limited experience as an international megastar – that if he wants to reduce contact between himself and his fans, he could simply shut down the website and then unsubscribe
from MySpace.

Perhaps there’s some subtlety I’m not seeing, having not yet attained enlightenment.

The website is also an avenue for selling Ringo merchandise, such as his most recent album, bumf from concerts, and so forth.

And again the worldwide chorus cries out, “Ringo Starr still releases albums and gives concerts?” The world sure is full of surprises.

To the unenlightened mind, it would seem that if your aim is to become a recluse, recording albums and giving concerts is potentially counterproductive.

Simply going away and not leaving a forwarding address seems the more obvious solution.

But that shows how little I know.

Perhaps that is the greatest of the master’s paradoxes: if a man releases an album, and gives a concert, and blogs about it on a social networking site, and no-one tells him whether they liked it or not, did it ever happen?

If you’re reading this, Ringo, Matthew JC. Powell really quite enjoyed Liverpool 8.

Tell him what you think of this column on

mjcp@optusnet.com.au

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